Anonymous discussion · Need to talk

Again, somehow this comes to me first

Again, somehow this comes to me first. School called during my work meeting for a missed permission form, even though both of us are listed as contacts and I had specifically asked my partner to handle school messages this week. I had to step out, find the form, call them, confirm everything before the deadline… the usual rescue operation. I know they may be overloaded too, and I should probably have checked the form myself. But if I keep fixing every small thing, nobody notices that the arrangement is unfair. Maybe they rely on me because they know I’ll complain but still do it. Feels petty, but it’s bothering me a lot. Should I first ask the school to send these things to both of us directly, or talk to my partner tonight about the pattern? I don’t want the child caught in “whose turn was it,” but I also can’t keep being the automatic backup.

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I’d do both: ask the school to contact both of you, but talk to your partner about the pattern tonight. Has your partner actually agreed to handle these messages, or was it only an informal expectation?‌

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